recovery

a few weeks ago i started working with clients again and i knew it would be challenging. after everything being so chaotic in my own life and everyone's life lately, there is the tendency to want to structure chaos. in your own world this is fine but you can't do this with clients. the therapeutic analogy is that you can go in someone's house but ask why the couch is in front of the door, do not try to rearrange their house.

it has been a while since i worked with clients and when i started working with my first couple of clients, i was so eager to help i almost forgot that analogy. i have been working with this one client whose life is pretty chaotic right now. emotional, financial, and relationship stresses have been through the roof and wreaking havoc on their life. i felt the tendency to want to structure that chaos but held back. as they continued telling their story, they mentioned they would sometimes cry without reason. i went deeper asking them to tell me more about the last time it happened and the feelings associated with it. this opened an unexpected door. they began talking about a terrible loss in their life which had not been discussed before. it was a really beautiful moment and connection which helped build the therapeutic relationship.