reflections on buddhism and psychoanalysis

"However, I wanted to ask your opinion about something in your post. I often struggle with existentialism's claim that we are "inexorably alone" and that the attachment-separation is a major developmental task. I struggle with this because I feel that all growth occurs within the context of emotional connections, not separate from them. "

You have some great questions and I hope I can give an equally good answer. I am certainly not an expert as I am too in search of answers.

Interpersonal relations are important for even the Buddhist have teachers. However, the goal of psychoanalysis and Buddhism alike is to look within ourselves to understand our own meaning and to create our own meaning. Communication with others helps us to help ourselves.

"I think of your earlier post where you mentioned all the bubbles that people live in. I liked that by the way the ipod bubble, the bmw bubble, etc. Is the goal of existential enlightenment or awareness to accept this seperation, to cultivate it?"

my position on the bubbles was to show the disconnection from each other but most importantly from themselves. People have become avoidant and look for distractions. Instead of looking within themselves to try to find happiness, people look to things to bring happiness. It almost reminds me of a wrinkle in time where people accept the views of others as their own with little or no thought of their own. My hope is that others may too awaken and have greater awareness.

"Independence is often seen as the developmental holy grail but I disagree. Being independent is often seen as not needing others, not feeling a sense of contigency from others...which to me sounds slightly pathological because humans are social creatures. If it is true that independence is our goal, then what of the idea that our sense of self is enhanced through feeling more related to others, not threatened by wanting and needing interactions. I agree more with relational theory which claims that interdependence is the goal, achieving productive interdependence is the major developmental task. What is your opinion on this?"

Independence in thought does not mean a life in physical or mental isolation. "insight is the key to liberation. We must comprehend the way things are to such a depth as to affect the very core of our being". In this quote by the Dalai Lama, he encourages that we make specific time for daily meditation even if it is very brief. By so doing we get in touch with the subtle nature of our souls and recognize this gift of life. If meditation evokes a deep meaning/or spiritual lesson within us, then this meaning or compassion can be shared with others. My thinking is that an independent mind helps to make us realize our connection to one another and to have greater compassion for one another.